Friday, August 17, 2012

Time to Make the Donuts

I told hubby that I was going to take Body Pump at 6AM.  We both laughed like we had just heard the funniest joke ever.  To say I am NOT a morning person is an extreme understatement.  My snooze button on my alarm clock no longer works because I literally wore it out.  I don’t even like to speak in the morning, let alone exercise.  Even I knew the chances of my dragging myself out of bed was not good. 

I set my alarm clock for 5:30 anyway.   I set the alarm on my phone for 5:40 (snooze button outwitted) and made the ring tone the theme song from Rocky.  EPIC wake up call!  Who can possibly stay in bed with that playing?

MegHan was the instructor.  I walked in and there were actually weights and stuff out.  It was 6:00 IN THE MORNING and there was actual equipment out, like we were ACTUALLY going to exercise. 
I took out my handy, dandy Buck Rogers secret decoder ring to check the message again. 

I could have sworn it said: 
M-e-e-t <space>
M-e-g-h-a-n <space>
f-o-r <space>
o-v-a-l-t-i-n-e <space>
<end message>

The stupid thing must be busted!

I was up…
I was there…
Meg could surely catch me before I hit the door…
I got all of the junk I needed to engage in 6 AM Body Pump.

We got to the part where Meg suggests adding more weight to work the legs.  When I took my first class, my friend warned me NOT to do that.  This time, she wasn’t there.  I thought I was sassy since I’ve been working out for 5 minutes, so I added weight.  Stop laughing – that part isn’t supposed to be funny.

At the end of Body Pump, MegHan announced that CXWORX was up next. 

We could leave at any time…

I had to go to work.  If anyone else would have left the room, I probably would have bailed too.  I'm such a follower.  But then that new voice that just joined the party in my head, the one that enjoys the torture exercise, reminded me that there were several ways I could shave 30 minutes off of getting ready work.  (I skipped makeup and hung my head out the window to dry my hair on the way.  I looked like a poodle that had just gone through electroshock therapy when I showed up for work but who cares? I work out.)

During the CXWORX, the girl next to me whispered, “She’s crazy.” 

MegHan has ninja ears.  She said, “I’m not crazy!”  

Let’s evaluate this statement, shall we?  Meg doesn’t think she’s crazy, but let’s review the facts:

·         CXWORX is 30 minutes of intense core training.
·         We had just finished 30 minutes of Body Pump. 
·         It’s 6:00 IN THE MORNING.  
·         MegHan is the only one in the room still smiling. 

I think it’s safe to say that she is indeed seven courses of crazy, with a side of cuckoo, and a cherry on top, but I’m certainly not going to be the one to tell her (to her face). 

There are a couple of parts of the CXWORX that trip me up a little.  First, you use exercise bands.  I’m always afraid the band is going to come loose from my foot and slap me in the face.  I’ve seen it happen in my head 1,000 times and I’m sure it’s going to go live one day.  Hopefully someone will catch it on film and I'll post it here for your viewing pleasure.

Second, there are these sideways c-crunch things.  Meg told us to sit on the “meaty part” of the side of our butts, and hold our legs together, up in the air.   The top half of your body is supposed to be sort of straight and pretty like you’re ready for tea.  (Or the coffee I thought I was going to get)  Since I’m pretty meaty all around and was getting tired, I just laid there, hoping she wouldn’t notice that I had nothing in the air.

MegHan does not have a snooze button.  She doesn't miss a whisper in her class and she's certainly not going to ignore you taking a nap in the front row.

All kidding aside, I left feeling great!  I was tired and it was hard work, but I had a good workout and it wasn’t even 8AM.  AWESOME!

I felt amazing until around 10:30, when my legs woke up and realized they had been assaulted in their sleep.  Then I had some explaining to do.


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